The Opposite of a Kiss

A proper kiss is a breeze that will stir the leaves resting on the forest floor of my heart
that have long since been raked into a pile, soaked by rain waters, 
layered and withered, slowly becoming a part of the ground on which they rest. A proper kiss will barrel through the pile of leaves like a child, scattering the dry skeletal fingers of the trees from which they fell, giving them new life as colorful flying things in the wind, only resting when at long last the child falls exhilarated and peaceful into their soft piles again.

Purposeful silence. The silence that resounds between two people with everything not said between them. The silence that fills with everything that could be said, inflated by imagination, sharpened by self indulgence and a desperate desire to say the thing that will end all argument, but gagged by the fear of discovery of the truth, and somehow the fear of injury.

For in silence, there is power without vulnerability. This is the opposite of a kiss.

Innocence and bubble bursting

We all start as innocents. Some of us grow up faster than others. Some of our parents can maintain our world-shield for longer than others, but everyone's bubble is burst eventually. The bubble bursting moment is that moment when a person experiences something so jarring to the narrative of his or her life that from that point on the color of the world is different. To see the world for the first time outside the tint of the bubble of expectations of what happens in life, what happens to me, is to lose my innocence. I wise person might say that this is the point when we can finally begin to know the world and embark on the road to wisdom. It's the moment that we recognize the brevity and preciousness of life and have the opportunity to start realizing our power and potential. The pain of the loss of our innocence is the birthing pain that propels us into the meaningfulness of real experience which can lead to better understanding.of ourselves and others. I would say, the opposite of wisdom is the attempt to live as if still inside the bubble, or worse, create another one. A lie bubble. A lie bubble that lets the one inside believe that they can still grow and grow wiser without honestly confronting the pain of reality. But there is only one real innocence. Like a child in the womb, we are not made to return there once it is our time to be born. Once you know the outside, you know it and you are a part of it.
     
Here are some examples of attempting to live inside a lie bubble or, just imagine your 18-year-old self talking:
     
     "I am not in a relationship because no one is good enough."

     "I am the only person who knows whats best for my child."

     "The reason why my relationship is falling apart is because we don't have a ________(house,car, baby...)"

     "Its important that I have everything settled before I do what I really want to do."

     "When I have (or when my child has) _______(relationship, job, car, etc...) I will be happy and find fulfillment."

   
  Here are some examples of living outside the bubble:

   "I am not in a relationship because I am not ready to be in a relationship."

   "Other people (teachers, friends, family) make important contributions to my child's formation and education."

    "The reason why my relationship is falling apart is because we don't communicate clearly and/or manage our expectations for each other."

   "Now is the only time to do what I really want to do."

   "I have many resources for emotional strength and my sense of fulfillment is not contingent on any one person or thing."